


You Can Change Your Life By Changing Your Heart

by Eskayrobot, Poaxath



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, And the healing process, Angst, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Heartbreak, I don't know a whole lot about heart transplant surgeries, I'm a writer not a doctor, Kylo is a bad guy that does bad things, Kylo's an Asshole, Not much detail but it's the basis of the story, Pining, Please Don't Hate Me, Rey had a prior relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-15
Updated: 2019-11-14
Packaged: 2020-10-19 12:16:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20657111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eskayrobot/pseuds/Eskayrobot, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Poaxath/pseuds/Poaxath
Summary: What would you do if you were given a second chance at life? Would you change your ways and strive to become a better person? Would you keep your life as it was before? What if the reason for your survival was at the cost of someone else's life? The life of someone that was very in love with a young woman. But what if you began to develop feelings for her, as well? Is ityouthat feels this way, or is it the lingering emotion of the previous owner of your new heart?





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

_ "There is someone here to see you, Mr. Ren. It's about a new shipment?" _

_ Kylo nodded, giving a tiny pinch to the thigh of the girl currently resting on his to encourage her to stand, the two at his side already detangling their limbs from his. He'd go handle business and return to pleasure before any of this lot missed him. _

* * *

"Let's get him hooked up and get this going! C'mon, people, _ move!"_

* * *

_ "Where is Hux?" Kylo asked as he stepped outside. His hand immediately went to the gun at his side, the hairs on the back of his neck raised in a primal warning that something was very wrong. _

_ "Your associate was detained, I'm afraid, Mr. Ren. But I have what you need." _

_ Kylo was stunned. Since when was he the slower draw? _

* * *

"This guy is in luck, a donor heart became free. Poor guy died in a car accident. They're a blood match." 

"Anyone on the list before him?" 

"He's first up." 

"Alright. Let's get him ready for transplant surgery." 

* * *

_ Kylo couldn't remember the last time he stared at the stars. Honestly, he couldn't remember the last time he even saw any stars, lost as they were beneath the smog of downtown and the ample light pollution. It made him almost nostalgic as he lay bleeding on the cold alley ground, a scant few stars peeking down to look upon him. They wanted to see if he was going to die, too. It was quite the show, after all. At least he was pleased to hear the other guy take his last sputtering breath. Kylo may have been the slower draw, but he was still a man of greater strength. _

_ As a cacophony of sounds and lights erupted around him, he couldn't help but be grateful for these strange few moments of mental clarity. When was the last time he could simply focus on what was in his head? It was...nice. _

* * *

"Your son was very lucky, Madame Senator. The bullet clipped his heart, which caused a slower leak than if he'd been shot outright. It was enough time to keep him alive until a donor heart was available." 

Leia sighed and nodded along. "I will have to donate to the funeral of that poor man. Do something for his family." 

"It's best that you keep all of your focus on yours for now, Madame Senator. But I will have a nurse bring your aid the information for the man's family." The doctor paused at the door, her face finally showing the strain. "Think of this as a second chance with him, Leia. You lost him once and now he's back. Maybe this time things will go better." 

Leia reached out for her son's hand, shaking her head slightly. "I can only hope you're right, Amilyn." 

* * *

The news had made her feel empty, her hand shaking as she held the phone to her ear. No, there was no way. This was some sort of elaborate prank—her fiance was going to walk through the door of their townhouse in a few moments. Just like he always did after work. 

“What do you mean?” she asked, her lips trembling.

“Miss Niima, I’m so sorry to say this, but your fiance, Rian, was in a car accident. He was hit by a drunk driver and was killed instantly.”

The air felt like it was sucked out of her chest, the first tears beginning to slide down her cheeks. No, no, no! This wasn’t happening! They were getting married in a month! The venue was booked with a non-refundable deposit for fuck’s sake—and now, Rey wasn’t even going to get to use it.

“C-can I see him?” she asked in a whisper. 

She had to see for herself. She had to know for sure that it was him and that this wasn’t just a mixup somehow. 

“I-I’m sorry, ma’am. He was listed as an organ donor and we’ve just had someone that needs a heart transplant. Your fiance was a perfect match—they’ve already taken him back to the operating room to...”

“Oh, I see,” she replied, heart sinking even more. 

Damn it, Rian! Why did he have to sign himself up to let someone else harvest his organs? 

She understood, of course—in the event of his death, he obviously wouldn’t need them anymore, and he wanted to make sure they would go to someone who did.

But still. Now she wouldn’t even get to see him until they had removed his heart and who knew what else and had him sewn back up before sending him to the morgue. 

“If it’s any consolation, I’m sure that whoever his heart is going to will be very grateful for this second chance at life. The hospital will contact you when he’s ready so that you may make arrangements. Again, I am so sorry for your loss, Miss Niima.”

“Thank you,” she whispered, hanging up the phone.

With a heavy sigh, her head drooped down until she was resting it against her knees. The first sob that tore from her was loud and uncontrolled, her entire body shaking with the force of it. She had given him her heart and he’d gone and given his to another. 

Maybe she would be able to see the recipient of the transplant and say her goodbyes to him. She’d seen stories of that happening, of it being a way to cope with the grief that was consuming her.

Mouse, her gorgeous black cat, jumped up beside her and tucked against her hip. Her loud purrs were soothing, and as Rey collapsed against the bed and buried her face into the soft fur, she let the gentle vibration soothe her as best she could. 

How was she ever going to be able to afford the funeral?

* * *

"A Solo always shoots first, Mr. _ Ren. _I guess that's what happens when you forsake your own name." 

There was a loud smack, so sharp Kylo felt it, too. 

"By the Maker_, Han! _ Your son comes back from the brink of death and all you can do is be an asshole? Maybe he'd been right about you all along!"

"Fuck, Princess! It was a joke!" A scruffling sound, like a hand through hair. "Damn, Leia, how did you learn to hit harder?" 

The darkness began to recede and Kylo could finally make out the dim outlines of the humans who had created him. He never thought he'd be so happy to see them again, but having nearly died was definitely putting some things into perspective. 

"Good. I can—I can still remind you that you're—you're a fuckin' useless jackass," Kylo rasped out, glaring up at his father. 

"See, he's fine," Han said, glaring back at Leia. "Good as fuckin' new."

"And what does it say about you as a person that the first thing your only son says upon waking is announcing to the world what you are?" Leia snarked. She then looked down at Ben, lifting her hand to her face. "You scared me shitless, Benny. We thought you were gone for good." 

Kylo sighed, clenching his jaw at the old nickname. While he held deep resentment for both his parents, Leia he hated less. She, at least, had tried to reconcile with him. Nevermind that he hadn't been ready to receive it yet, back then. 

"I'm still here, Mom," he replied gruffly. 

Leia was just about to say more when her ancient aide came bustling into the room. "Praise the Maker! Master Solo is alive!" Mr. Chester Threepio said immediately, throwing his gnarled old hands into the air in praise. "Now, then, Madame Senator, I have that information you asked me to obtain from Ms. Orso." 

"So soon?" Leia gasped, turning to accept the manila folder. 

"What did you need Jyn for?" Han asked, moving to peer over Leia's shoulder. 

Kylo, meanwhile, felt a dark mood settle over him. Oh, so he was almost _ dead_, and yet his mother was still working. Go figure. She could be as tender as she wanted to, but she never stopped being New York Senator Leia Organa-Solo. 

"The poor Johnson boy, the one who gave his heart to Benny, didn't have much family. Just a distant great uncle in California and a fiancee. The hospital was going to put the uncle in charge of his affairs, since he wasn't yet married, but I've been trying to intervene. That poor girl has gone through enough, she deserves to see him to rest. She was his emergency contact but the hospital had very little other information about her. I had Jyn look into her so we could get all the information we needed to make things easier for her," Leia explained as she looked over the information. "Oh, look at that, she's close by. Maybe I'll pay her a visit, get this ball rolling. I'm told the body is still in the morgue. She can't afford to pay for his funeral and his life insurance barely covers a casket." She looked at Ben. "Are you going to hate me more if I look into this? The doctor said you aren't going anywhere for a long time." 

Kylo sighed. His anger had faded, though not by too much. He was still pissed that she wanted to go immediately, but he couldn't help but feel a twinge in his foreign heart at the fate of that poor woman. Her fiance died _ and _she was apparently broke. She was probably doing worse than him, if he were to wager.

"Go ahead, Mom," Kylo reassured her. 

"Fantastic! I will call the car around, Madame Senator! Oh, and Master Solo, there are some young ladies waiting to see you. Shall I send them in?" Mr. Threepio asked. 

Kylo smirked at that, already nodding. Han, however, spoke up. 

"I don't think a room full of strippers is the best course of action for your heart, _ Kylo,_" the older man sneered. 

"You can stay, Han," Leia said, already gathering her things. 

Han knew this was a trick, he knew a trap when he saw one, but, well…"Yeah. My son needs me." 

"You're a gross old pervert," Kylo said, rolling his eyes. 

"Yes I am," Han smirked proudly. 

* * *

It had been three days since Rian had been killed, three days that his body was sitting in a refrigerator. As she poured over the bills, the past due notices and the final notices, she couldn’t help but cry some more. Not only was he gone, but she didn’t have anything to spare to give to the electric and the water, and pay her rent, and all of it. As it was, she was living on a diet of boxed mac and cheese and some graham crackers someone had left in the breakroom at work. It was a bleak outlook, to say the least. They had saved for months for their wedding, and then once it was completely paid, they’d buy a house and all of that.

Unfortunately, that’s not what happened. Sure, the wedding was paid for, but Rian had been laid off from his work and had just been getting back into it when the accident happened.

Looking over to the cat that was on the corner of her desk, Rey bit her lip. What could she do? She had no family to call and ask for help, and Rian’s friends Poe and Finn were pretty much just as broke at the moment. It was hard all around, and it just sucked when no one knew how to prepare for an unexpected event like this.

“What are we going to do, Moomoo?” she asked the cat, smiling at the slow blink she received. 

Startled by a knock on the door, she froze for a moment. She wasn’t expecting any visitors. No one should be stopping by. 

As she rose and headed to the door, she did her best to pick up dirty items along the way. From dishes from a meal four days ago, to the slew of clothes lying across couches and on the floor. 

Quickly wiping her eyes to make sure there were no stray tears, she cracked open the door. She peeked around it, opening it wider at the sight of the small woman before her. She was short, lines on her face from stress and age, she’d bet. And she looked—strictly based on her clothing—wealthy. What the hell?

“Can I help you?” Rey asked quietly. 

"Are you Rey Niima?" Leia asked, soft and comforting. She may have been a shitty mother, according to her son, but she knew how to use that soothing mom voice. 

Rey swallowed hard and nodded faintly. "I am. How do you know that?"

"The heart of your Rian is beating in my son Ben's chest as we speak," Leia explained. "I spoke with the hospital regarding your future arrangements, bills and expenses and what not, and I came to offer you anything you may need at all. A shoulder to cry on or the money for his funeral or paying all your bills for a year, anything at all to make your life simpler. Plus, my assistant is picking up some food for you. The hospital didn't have you on record so I wasn't sure what allergies you had. Do you have any, dear?" 

Rey just blinked at her for a moment before her face crumpled and she began to sob. 

"Oh, Rey, dear. Can I—?" Leia waited for a shaky nod before she surged forward, enveloping the younger woman in her arms. "Go ahead and cry, Rey. You have been through _ hell._ It's not fair, not at all. You poor, sweet thing." 

Rey clung to the smaller woman like she was a lifeline—like she was a beacon in the darkness. This new woman that she'd never met before in her life and she was holding her like she'd known her forever. 

"You can—you can come inside," she hiccuped, stepping back after a few moments while wiping her eyes. 

Leia stepped gingerly inside, her heart breaking all the more as she took in the tiny abode. There were DIY wedding decorations _ everywhere_, and a near-obnoxious amount of photos of the young couple. How in the world was the poor kid coping with the evidence of all that she'd lost constantly around her? She felt tears prickle in her eyes. She needed to do something, everything in her power to help. 

"Oh. I'm Leia. Leia Organa-Solo," Leia remembered to introduce as she stepped into the little living room. 

Sniffling, Rey tried her best to offer a smile. "I would introduce myself, but you already know who I am. It's nice to meet you, Leia. I wish it could be under better circumstances, but I'm glad your son is...is still here."

"What do you need, Rey? What is the first thing that pops into your head? I want to make this somehow more bearable for you. Because I meant what I said, it's not fair that he died and you don't deserve to suffer a single moment because of it," Leia offered. She wouldn't dare say what Han had said, which was that the other young man had deserved to live more. She knew Ben was...problematic. But, like Dr. Holdo had said, it was a second chance. She _ had _to be sure that that poor man's sacrifice wasn't wasted. 

Rey's first instinct was to say no, that she didn't need the help. That her fiance had died and Leia's son had gotten lucky. That's all it was, was just timing. Instead, she just whispered, "I'm behind on _ everything. _ My rent, my electric, water, everything. I don't know if that's what you're offering, and if not, please know that I'm not _ looking _for money. I don't want you to feel like you owe me because of what happened."

"Consider it all done. I'll have my assistant get your account information for your bills and we'll get that handled for you. What about food, Rey?" Leia asked next. She was already compiling a mental list of everything she intended to do, including hiring someone to come in and help around the house. Rose would be good for that. 

"I'm not really eating a lot lately," Rey shrugged, sitting down on one of the couches. She gestured for Leia to take the one across from her and leaned forward to pick up her tea from the coffee table. Their townhouse may be small, but at least it was clean and nice. She had that going for her, at least. "Could you...could you tell me something?"

She met the older woman's gaze, pleading for some bit of knowledge. 

"Anything at all, dear," Leia replied. 

"Your son...Ben. How old is he?" Rey asked, biting her lip while tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. 

"Thirty-one," Leia answered.

Rey nodded thoughtfully, looking up at the older woman with hopeful eyes. "And is he...good? Is he a good man?"

Was this woman's son deserving of Rian's heart? Rian was kind and good and all things sweet. Was Ben the same way?

Leia sighed. "He can be, at times. I'm afraid that his father and I failed him in his upbringing and someone else came in to exploit his worser qualities. But he _ can _be good. He can." Leia was pretty sure she was merely reassuring herself at this point. 

"Can I—I mean, would it be all right if I met him? Sometime? Not soon or anything since he's recovering. But for some closure," Rey said, feeling her face flush at how desperate she sounded. 

"Oh, Rey, of course. Whenever you'd like, just let me know. I'll make sure he is available for you. The doctor said that he'll be in recovery for a while, but I'll keep you posted. And, in the meantime, I hope you know you can turn to me for anything at all. Your fiance's heart in my son...well, that basically makes you my daughter-in-law. If you don't mind, I mean," Leia said, not wanting to put too much pressure in the girl. 

"No, no, you have a point," Rey conceded, a weary but truly happy smile on her face. "As I said, I don't want you feeling like you owe me for anything. If you'd like for me to cease contact, I can. Absolutely. I just wanted to know that it—that _ he _is going to be taken care of."

Leia's face softened a bit more, gentle eyes crinkling with a sad smile. "He will be. That I promise you, Rey." She dug into her purse for a pen and leaned forward to grab the stick notes on the coffee table. "This is my personal number. Let me know if you need anything, okay? Anything at all. I can't tell you how much this means to me, and I know to you, as well."

Rey took the little yellow piece of paper silently, nodding along as she looked down at the numbers, staring without really seeing them. "Thank you, Leia."

"You're welcome to come see him while he's still in the hospital, if you'd like. Once he's out of intensive care, of course, since the doctors are being very careful to prevent infection," Leia said as she rose to her feet. 

"I think I'd like that. Thank you," Rey said as she followed the older woman to the door. 

"Oh! And before I forget, my assistant will be dropping some food items off for you once he's done shopping." Leia turned and engulfed Rey in her arms once more, her strength surprising for her size. "I hope to see you again soon."

"I'm sure you will," Rey sniffled, squeezing her eyes shut as she returned the embrace. 

And then Leia was gone, down the steps in a flash and already in a cab to who knew where. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter one was written with Eskayrobot, but going forward, it'll just be Poaxath finishing it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My stories aren't abandoned! *shakes fist at the sky* I'm just really swamped with work

* * *

True to her word, Leia's assistant brought by some food, from fresh groceries, and even what looked to be a complete meal from a nice restaurant. Mr. Threepio, as he was called, was...excitable. He reminded Rey of a mixture between a toddler and a Golden Retriever. He asked far too many questions and also seemed unable to hold still for very long. It wasn't that he was a bull in a china shop or anything, but he was fascinated by nearly every piece of decor in her tiny little townhome. And if he talked about the _ Maker _with his hands held up high in the air one more time, she was fairly sure she was going to strangle him. 

When he left, she couldn't help but smile, though, his antics enough to make her feel just a bit lighter as she devoured a hot meal.

* * *

A few days later, she received a phone call from the utility company, saying that her bills had been paid up completely, and that her account was even set to autopay from a bank that definitely did _ not _belong to her. And when Rey called the owner of the townhouse, he informed her that a year had been paid on her rent, as well. 

She swallowed past the lump in her throat, unable to even fathom the thought that someone could be so generous. Granted, yes, Leia had every reason to be grateful that her son was still alive, and she probably felt she owed it to Rey to make up for her loss in some way. Even so, the absolute _ most _she could have done was to just stop by and say thank you. She hadn’t had to go out of her way to offer as much assistance as she had.

What really blew Rey away, though, was that when she was able to call the funeral home to make some arrangements and see if a payment plan could be set up, the funeral director informed her that there had been a stash of money set aside specifically for her to use to get Rian’s body taken care of. 

Her heart thundered and as she cried for what felt like the hundredth time over the past few days as she managed to make an appointment to come in later that day to go over the...options.

There was really no way to nicely describe what funeral homes did. They collected the bodies from the coroner, harvested the rest of their organs, which would be disposed of properly, and then they were, in essence, soaked in formaldehyde and sewn back up, gussied up with some makeup that never _ quite _made them look like they were sleeping, and put on display for friends and family to gawk at until they were tossed into the earth. 

But as she walked out of the building, squinting against the afternoon sun, she felt oddly at peace. He was getting taken care of, and she hadn’t had to spend a penny out of pocket. Instead of putting him through the process of embalming, she’d opted for cremation. That way, she could take him with her in the event that she had to move, and it would soothe her just a bit to know he was still ‘with’ her. And when she was ready—if she was ever ready—she could scatter his ashes. 

And, of course, none of this would even be possible without Leia’s support. The woman had left a large enough sum of money that would make for a grand funeral, and with her having chosen cremation, she told the funeral director to send the remainder of the money back or to use it for other families in need.

After a quick phone call, the funeral director had told her that Leia had selected the second option, and Rey’s heart swelled just a little with the knowledge that there was some good to come out of this.

The least _ she _could do was pay that visit to Leia and make sure to thank her again. With the burden of bills off of her shoulders, she was able to grieve a bit more freely in her own way. Plus, Ben wouldn’t be feeling well enough for visitors for a while, not until he was able to stay conscious instead of being forced to sleep from copious amounts of morphine. 

She made a mental note to go home and do some research on the actual surgery and how it would affect the recipient’s life. While it would be a huge change for her to live without Rian, how would Ben’s life change? Maybe she could ask him in person when she saw him.

* * *

“Hi, my name is Rey Niima, and I’m looking for Ben...Organa?” Rey asked as she shuffled from foot to foot. 

The nurse behind the counter looked up from her romance novel to gaze boredly over her chart and shook her head. “No one here by that name.”

Rey frowned, trying to remember the other part of Leia’s last name. “Uhm, how about Ben Solo?”

With another passive glance at her clipboard, the nurse smacked her gum and said, “Down the hall and to the left. Room J2015.”

“Thank you so much,” Rey breathed before racing off.

The hospital had the sterile smell of too much disinfectant that couldn’t hide the underlying scent of sickness. The walls were that white color that lacked any sort of personality or sense of comfort. There was only the whiteness and the muffled groans of pain from behind closed doors. 

_ What are you doing here, Rey? _ she thought. _ Is meeting this guy really going to give you the closure you need? _

Was it going to help her cry a little bit less into her pillow at night before lying awake to stare up at the ceiling until the first rays of dawn peaked through the window? Maybe. But then again, maybe not. She wouldn’t really know either way until she’d actually done it. Now that Rian had plans in place, it was one step closer to getting this shard out of her chest.

She had to thank Leia, she kept reminding herself. Meet Ben, however briefly, and thank Leia. Then get the fuck out before she overstayed her welcome. 

Stopping in front of the room, she shoved her hands into the pockets of her dress while weighing her options. She could turn around right now. Turn around now and no one would be the wiser. She could pretend she had never ventured into this place, that she didn’t know exactly which door Ben and Rian’s heart were hiding behind. 

_ You’re such a coward. Stop pussy-footing around and just knock on the damn door. _

Sucking in a breath, she raised her fist to the heavy wood and gave a quick rap of her knuckles.

“Come in!” 

She cracked the door open slowly, peeking around it like the monster in the closet was just behind it.

Leia stood from the chair situated next to the bed, a bright smile on her tired face. “Rey! Oh, we’re so glad you’ve decided to come! Aren’t we, Han?” She threw a box of tissues at the chair on the other side, startling the older man awake.

“Huh, what? Yes, we are. We’re so glad,” he replied as he jerked upright. He rubbed his eyes and pushed the box away. Apparently it wasn’t the first time his wife had thrown something at him while he was sleeping. “What are we glad for, princess?”

"This is Rey, the young woman I was telling you about. Her fiance saved Ben," Leia said as she turned back around and enveloped Rey in a giant hug. "How are you doing? I saw the arrangements for the funeral on the funeral home's website. I'm glad it was taken care of."

"Thank you so much," Rey offered quietly, eyes shut as she squeezed the woman back just a little tighter. 

Leia pulled back a bit to look at her, cupping the side of her face in a gesture similar to how a mother would a daughter. 

Well, Leia _ had _said she was pretty much her daughter-in-law now, right?

"Of course. I know nothing can change the situation, but if it can relieve your burden even just a little bit, I want to help. Here, have a seat," she replied, ushering her into the hideous thing upholstered in some green diamond pattern from a few decades ago. The wooden arm rests were worn darker from thousands of hands smoothing over them, the joints creaking wearily from too much use over the years. 

Rey nervously smoothed her hands over the skirt of her dress, feeling a bit out of place.

"Thank you," she said, looking next to the man that Leia had awoken when she'd come in. "You must be Ben's father?"

"Yeah, that's me," he replied, leaning across the arm of his own chair to shake her hand. "Han Solo. You must be Rey."

"Yeah, that's me," she smiled softly up at him. 

After a moment, she turned to the bed in the middle of the room. There was a rhythmic beeping with each pulse of his heart, a steady blip on the monitor beside him. The man in the bed was pale, with dark circles under his eyes from what had to be exhaustion that no amount of rest or morphine could ease. He was handsome, in his own unique way—with his full lips and large nose, and yet, it all melded together perfectly. Even those large ears, peeking out from underneath shaggy black hair were attractive in a way that said he wasn't perfect. His lashes fanned out against the top of his cheeks, shifting slightly with the phases of deeper sleep. 

"I take it this must be Ben," she murmured quietly. 

Leia came around to the other side of the bed and took her son’s hand in her own. She gave it a loving squeeze. “Yes it is.”

Rey tilted her head at him, silently studying his features. He looked intense, even in his sleep, though there was a certain peacefulness to him that she guessed could only be achieved through help from some morphine. 

What did it feel like to wake up with someone else’s heart in your chest? No doubt it was painful, since the research she had done on the subject had shown the entire process. Before the surgery, they gave him some anti-rejection drugs, even with a perfect blood match. The body still saw a new heart as foreign. They split his ribcage to gain access to the vulnerable organs underneath, and after closing him back up, he was kept in the ICU for a few days before they moved him to a normal room to accept visitors. 

“He’s a god damn idiot is what he is,” Han grumbled from the chair beside her. 

_ “Han!” _Leia warned in a hiss.

Rey looked over to him. “What do you mean?”

Han ignored Leia, straightening up a bit more as he stretched out his back. “Look, kid—Rey. Ben’s...he can be a good kid. He was, back when he was a lot smaller. But now he’s wild, untamed. Like he’s gone feral in the sense that he doesn’t know how _ not _act like a criminal.”

She frowned. “A criminal?” She looked at Leia next. “What does he mean?”

“Damn it, Han,” Leia sighed. 

He just rolled his eyes. “She has the right to know, Leia. Ben is not a good person anymore. He was when he was a boy, but not anymore. Now he’s always partying and getting into trouble with the police. How he gets out of it, we can’t ever be sure, but I think he knows some people.”

“What kind of people?” Rey asked, puzzled.

“The kind of people that you don’t dare just go knock on their doors and ask questions. Not unless you want to leave in a bodybag,” Leia supplied quietly with a glance down at her son.

His eyes were still closed and his breathing was still steady, though there was a tightness to the corners of his mouth.

“You see,” she continued. “Ben had a rather...rough childhood. Not financially or anything, but Han and I fought all the time—”

“To be fair, it was always _ you _ coming after _ me,” _Han interrupted.

“Because _ you _were the irresponsible one!” Leia snapped. “You were the one that made promises you wouldn’t keep, you were the one that always left us, and you—”

“And _ you _were the one that also never had time for your only son,” a voice rasped from the bed. 

Rey turned wide eyes down to Ben, startled by how deep his voice was. She supposed it shouldn't have surprised her, given how large his body was, but it did. Even with the raspy quality it took from sleep and what had to be a dry throat. 

"Ben—" Leia instantly started, as though there had been no break from her argument with her husband to the one with her son. 

Ben struggled to push himself into a sitting position, and out of pure instinct, Rey rushed over to offer assistance.

“I don’t need help!” he snarled, and she was sure he’d have pushed her away if he could reach her. 

Frowning, she stepped back, placing her hands on her hips. “You just got out of surgery. It isn’t terrible to accept help from someone every now and then.”

That seemed to capture his attention and he looked at her, eyes narrowing dangerously. “Why are you even here? Just because I have your boyfriend’s heart in my fucking chest doesn’t mean that I’m him.”

_ “Benjamin!” _ Leia bellowed, murderous rage on her face. “Don’t you _ dare—” _

Ben ignored her, those dark eyes of his sweeping up and down Rey’s body. 

“You have no place in this story anymore—yours is over. You’re nobody—you’re nothing. Just a sad little woman that’s clinging to whatever remnant she can of her dead man.”

Fury rose in Rey’s chest, and before she even realized it, she’d stepped forward and slapped him clean across the face. She stood frozen as the sound rang out through the room, and watched as red bloomed across his cheek.

He looked shocked—stunned. Like he hadn’t been expecting her to actually _ do _anything at his taunting. 

Leia and Han were watching from the edge of the bed, their own faces a mixture of mortification, anger, and perhaps something like relief.

“You know,” Rey began, willing her voice not to tremble from the surge of emotions. “Leia told me you could be good. That you were a good man that had gone through some things. I see now that she was very wrong on that account.” She turned to Leia and offered the woman a sad smile before looking back to Ben. “And you’re wrong. I am _ not _nothing. I am Rey Niima, and my story is beating inside your chest right now. I really wanted you to turn out differently, to be a man worthy of Rian’s heart. It turns out that you’re a cruel man that’s acting like a child. I hope you make a full recovery, Ben, and I hope that whenever you see that scar on your chest that you remember why it’s there.”

With that, she turned from him, giving Leia her attention. "Thank you for your kindness, Leia. I appreciate the gesture."

"Rey—" Leia called after her, and Rey ignored it as she kept walking, leaving the room behind her.

Her blood was boiling, and she was surprised she wasn’t crying yet. Perhaps it was just the hormones and emotions coursing through her and they hadn’t quite caught up yet. Whatever the reason, she knew one thing for sure: Benjamin Solo didn’t deserve Rian’s heart, and he was not a good man. She had hoped for some sort of closure, and this was about as good as it was going to get. 

Fuck him.


End file.
